pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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