As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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