your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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