Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Randomize
