Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Randomize
