Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
