South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Randomize