Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
