brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Randomize