I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
