an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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