Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
