he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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