You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
