They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize
