you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
