The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
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