We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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