Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Your penis caused this!
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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