we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
It's like God shit irony all over that family
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
