Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
