Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Can I color on your dick again?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
