yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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