This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize