Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize
