If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
My dick has a subreddit
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Randomize
