she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
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