So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
