Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
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