I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
I skipped work to stalk him.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
