So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
And then my night got REAL pukey
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize