i don't like sucking hair
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
