there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
