please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
