I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
