on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
