do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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