Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
