did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Randomize
