Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
