what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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