Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Randomize
