Having a random hookup so left but love u
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
