Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Randomize
