he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize