Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
