Is it normal to miss your booty call?
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
