Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
