I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
