either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Randomize
