tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize
